my history and i....

Its been awhile since the last time i blogged. A lot of things happened and i'm glad its all okay now. This blog is about history, dedicated to those moments when you wished you had done something, the moments where when you look back you wished you could do it differently and the moments where you regretted that decision. But its not only those bad moments i'll be talking about. I wish to also touch those moments where you would cherish it forever, those unforgettably-totally-life-changing moments in our lives.

For me, i had a ton of those moments. The bad ones in particular are always the most memorable since, you know... it kinda scars you for life. Its ok right? its all been said and done and usually your already over it.... right?..haha...WRONG!! In truth is... its actually playing on a loop in your mind from time to time. Like an old broken record that wont stop playing the same old part of a beautiful song. I regret these moments. These moments of absolute weakness. And those moments when my dumb side comes out. And also those wrong time moments where you wished you were never there. I've stolen stuff ( i admit its bad- but that was when i was just ten i think and am not doing it anymore.), i've lied (yes i have.... a lot... trying to change that.) yes, i have talked smack about someone that i was not suppose to and yes my decision making processes aren't perfect and has a bad record. The list goes on and on and on... I know a lot of you people do these kinda of stuff too and have these kinds of situation happen in any particular moment of your lives, but hey, these stuff makes us human. And another thing with regrets is... you wont want to repeat it again. How crazy is that? haha.

The other part of history, which are the good moments are always the ones that are over shadowed by the bad one. Like always, we tend to see the black from the white. I loved these moments. I cherish them dearly. The great moments with my siblings. The moments i had with my friends. The great feeling of being a part of something big. These are all moments that i would like to live it again. It keeps me going. But the problem is, i tend to forget it. Forget about the moments that led me to the memorable ones. And the bad memories keep repeating back. I'm also afraid that history would haunt me one day. I know most of it was when i was younger and more naive and stupid, but the fact that there is a probability that someone out there might remember is just scary. I dont want to be the guy that loses everything because of one little dot in my history. Or be alone because of what ive said in the past. It's all so overwhelming.

So, what can i say from all this stuff? Well, firstly, nobody is perfect. There was only one record of a perfect human in this world and everybody is trying to follow him. The history that we make is a part of us. It defines who we were and what we had learnt and it affects our personality today. Without it you're not you.

Secondly, be thankful for you history. Without them, you might be doing those stupid stuff today or maybe in the future where it affects more. Without them, maybe you wont know how good it is to score in an exam or how much it hurts falling from a bicycle or how great it feels to be in love. Those moments gives us appreciation of what we have now, so be thankful.

And lastly, live life to the fullest. Honestly, you can't live life with no regrets. Its ignorant and its selfish. Living life with no regrets just shows how much you dont care about what you did in the first place. Live life to the fullest. With this, you would avoid mistakes that you had done in the past. The things that made you regret. And continue doing things that spur those memorable moments in your lives.

My history is not much. But its full of ups and downs and i'm thankful for it and the beautiful part about my history is.. I'm still writing it. I hope you have the power in you to write it yourself too. Goodluck to you...